We have come a long way. My first firearm was a single shot .22 rifle that I bought from a fellow food transfer and packaging specialist (carry out boy at a food store) in a parking lot transaction. It was in rough condition but a five spot would not buy much, even in 1966. I took the old rifle home, disassembled it and went to work spiffing it up. The stock was made of a mystery wood that closely resemble pine after the walnut stain was removed and the “surface rust” hid any number of pits and deep erosion. The little rifle shot straight enough to gather plenty of squirrels for the pan and a neat, season end collection of salted tails sold to a lure manufacturer to make buck-tail spin baits.
My fishing equipment was comprised of a Garcia Conolon rod and a prized Mitchell 300 reel with enough terminal tackle to fill an old tin box with a single tray. It worked fine, bringing a good number of blue gill and an occasional channel cat to the table. I will never lose my love of rods and guns, but the landscape has changed. Successful couples must have secrets. Before harping on the sanctity of marriage and full disclosure, my secrets involve what is behind the door to the gun safe and hidden away in the lockers on a bass boat. It is wise to keep your wife out of the safe and away from all those dangerous treble hooks and toxic bait sprays hidden from view in the rod lockers. Downsizing from a 21’ bass boat to a 12’ kayak was challenge enough, but the inevitable assembly of pounds of tackle and over 20 rods in one place was traumatic. It is hard to explain to anyone who has not been rabidly afflicted with the urge to match wits with a piscatorial foe or wiley grey squirrel. In the photo accompanying this piece, an astute observer will note 3 rods that have never been used and many more that have seen limited duty. Shameful comes to mind. I held a garage sale this past year in an attempt to re-home a number of rods, reels and lures, but failed in this retail exercise. Folks would rather buy new stuff, colorfully assembled in China, than rods and reels of US origin, decidedly better quality, but not as cheap, by a long shot.
I tried to explain that all hobbies have expense, relying on my perceptions of golf as an example. I asked her if she had ever priced golf balls, considered the vast array of clubs, bags, shoes, green fees, nifty hats, cart rentals, etc. This ploy was ineffective. I explained that golf club designs were on upward trajectory with synthetic shafts and exotic alloy heads and such, requiring constant rotation in the duffers arsenal. Her response was to the point. You can’t afford to add golf to your list of pursuits. The lady has a point. Best to stick to fishing and gather a little red meat for the slow cooker.
I’ll end this piece with advice for those that are similarly afflicted with a passion for hunting and fishing. Don’t let her near your gun safe. Secret your stores of ammunition in a number of different locations lest she see the myriad boxes of ammo that will go to your heirs for disposition. Hide your rods and reels in various locations, the tool shed, garage or buried in a locker on the boat. Never allow your baits, spools of line and other assorted tackle come to rest in a single location. When she puts it all together, something is going to get painted, furniture is going to be replaced, new kitchen gadgets are going to appear and she will begin dropping hints about the miles on her car. All embarrassingly practical and impossible to defend against. Secrets are okay, but when the lid comes off, and it will, be ready. Your wallet is going to take a hit and there isn’t one damned thing you can do about it! It is why we love them…….they will level the playing field, trust me.
Have a great week!
SR
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